I’ve been on a personal journey with Thirty Seconds To Mars for quite some time. It started in 2005, and has been quite an exciting ride. MARS music has always been a driving force of self discovery, change, and moments of clarity for me. In particular, their 2013 album Love Lust Faith + Dreams (https://itunes.apple.com/us/album/love-lust-faith-+-dreams/id620572548?ign-mpt=uo%3D4) has been a guiding light to helping me find my way towards realizing my truest potential again. If you haven’t done so yet, listen to this incredible album and see what doors it opens for you.
First off, happy 2014! Hope it started off on a high note for all of you. We’ve come a long way, and for some of us 2013 wasn’t so great of a year. But here we are. Fresh hopes, new dreams, and new chapters in our life waiting to unfold.
Remember my last few blogs? About Tulsa and this feeling of…completion. I finally have a chance to sit down and think about it a bit. Reflect. And this will be loooong…
Let me just say, that trip was awesome for me. I went and celebrated my birthday with some old friends, got to see Thirty Seconds To Mars again, and basically came away feeling closure. And renewal.
It’s fairly obvious that at times, anxiety overwhelms me. Until I remind myself to stay in the moment and just not sweat about things that have yet to be written. I think a part of me felt the typical drawing to close of the year. Endings, reflection, etc. And frankly, 2013 burned me out a bit. Not that is was all doom and gloom, it was just a lot of soul searching and quite a roller coaster ride of things going on in my life. For a long time, I wondered what the hell it was all for. I think I felt stuck in some repeating cycle that I couldn’t figure out how to break. Of course, the more I thought about it the more I’d grind my teeth and get frustrated because it felt totally outside of my control. It felt like every three steps forward I took, I wound up either falling on my face or taking two steps back to regroup. It left me flustered, confused, and doubting myself…doubting happiness.
30 Seconds To Mars performing “Up In The Air” at How The Edge Stole Christmas 2013 in Grand Prairie, TX on Dec 5th.
Jared Leto calls out a guy for not having enough fun. Dec 5, 2013 - Grand Prairie, TX
That’s the extent of videos I’ll share from my phone. I have some of “City Of Angels” and other songs, but I had my camera sideways b/c I wasn’t watching through it *lol* I was also side stage so my videos aren’t the best b/c I was dancing around and wasn’t planning on sharing anything.
However, I am currently uploading videos my friend took. The lightning wasn’t the best, and he’s not an Echelon or a videographer so you’ll have to excuse his choppy videos but I’ll post them here in a bit.
I was talking to some friends on Twitter tonight, and I honestly admitted Tulsa might be my last MARS show. Now, I don’t mean forever ever. But then again, maybe I do. I just don’t know.
Don’t get me wrong, it’s not for a lack of love for this band. They’ve had my heart since 2005. I adore Thirty Seconds To Mars. Maybe it’s the crazies, the groupies, the drama…I dunno. I’m not about to let that overshadow the fact that I have been on an amazing journey with this band, and have met incredible people. MARS are probably the longest chapter(s) in the story of my life. I am eternally grateful…it just boggles my mind.
I honestly don’t remember following any band as long as I’ve followed MARS, even if I wouldn’t have called myself Echelon until maybe a few years ago. I still question it from time to time…do I really get it. I mean, it took awhile. It’s always changing, but it’s exciting. And here I am…
Thirty Seconds To Mars & “Grrl” Seven - Grand Prairie, TX - Dec 5, 2013
Thanks for the awesome m&g guys, and killer show! See you in Tulsa =)
Jared has a very natural charisma and magnetism about him. I never intentionally go into the photo saying “I’m going to latch onto Jared like a dolt” but it never fails! I’m just happy to see I don’t have my head in his armpit like I did in Tahoe. Or looking like I’m playing with Shannon’s chest like my MARS300 m&g photos (I wasn’t, I swear! *lol*)
I keep telling myself, next m&g I’m going to plant myself by Tomo and get a pic with that mofo. I’m a woman on a mission now…
Super sweet Shannon said he liked my pants and thought they were really cool. Tomo was his usual upbeat, silly self. I feel bad because usually I’m so shy, I never manage to say much or make eye-contact but Shannon seems to make it a mission to make people feel comfortable….and always gets me to smile or laugh.
When the q&a started, Jared asked us a lot of questions at first. I honestly turned to the girl next to me and joked, “So, I guess q&a meant Jared asks us questions?”
Anyway, I will never get tired of meeting these guys. Super cool, very down to earth. Even with the shit weather, they seemed in good spirits and took the time to do a q&a, signed our stuff (no pre-signed merch), and did the pics. I’d already given Reni my gifts for the guys earlier - which I never bring, but this time I had something special for each of them - so luckily I didn’t have to bring those into the m&g.
We were a small group, so it was nice and relaxed. And the handful of us that had side stage (inc me) got to go onstage for “Up In The Air” later that night.
I’m not much of a concert photographer, as I’m busy having fun…and my camera phone sucks. But I did manage to get some pics and videos I’ll try to sort through and upload later.
That moment you look up and Tomo is headbanging with you, sharing that brilliant energy he has.
That moment Jared makes eye contact with you and sees the tears in your eyes because his words have moved you so deeply.
That moment when you feel your heartbeat in time with Shannon’s drumming and you feel yourself on another plane of existence where nothing else matters…because at that moment, everything is perfect.
Then you look around and realize other people feel this way, too.
But you don’t feel like a tiny voice in a sea of millions. You feel alive.
Then you know … this is where you belong.
I AM THE ECHELON. And we are one…